don't quit, don't even quit.

an entirely red sox preoccupied preview of the sixth game of the 2009 world series

—now, I uncomfortably dislike Curt Schilling as much as the next gay commie pinko liberal Red Sox fan who is grateful for his contribution to the 2004 World Championship but has, in the intervening five years, decided that his high-volume conservative politicking now outweighs his folk hero status, but. But!

The Phillies are already throwing Pedro out on the mound for Game 6; they should highly consider hiring probably-not-actually-beloved-at-all ex-Philly Curt Schilling to sit in the dugout, just to get the Game 6 at Yankees Stadium/The Last Night of the Yankee Dynasty mojo going. I’m just saying.

Alternately, the Yankees could pay Grady Little to throw out the first pitch.

ESPN.com’s Pedro-related headline reads “Daddy, I’m Home”. It’s vaguely dirty, slightly confusing, and I like it.

I guess this just goes to show that you never know.

this is my last post about the team formerly known as the barry bondses, i swear

Brad Penny to the Giants. Several things:

1. I should apologize to Giants fans, I brought this on them. This is personally my fault for flirting with the Giants behind Boston’s back while I was on vacation.

2. Also, now he will probably go 4-1 with a 3.07 ERA for the remainder of the year and Sox fans will experience a sensation similar to when I slipped in the shower while shaving this morning and mashed my head against a tiled wall.

3. And, I’m going to have to break into Theo Epstein’s house during the off-season and tattoo “NOTE TO SELF: NO MORE NATIONAL LEAGUE RECLAMATION PROJECTS” on his forehead, and that’s going to take some time.

4. But the worst part: his insertion in the Giants’ rotation while they’re in Philly on Wednesday means that we will miss out on the cosmically mind-blowing possibility of seeing Pedro match up with Tim Lincecum. I know it probably would have been depressing without the addition of a time machine, but seriously. PEDRO and TIM LINCECUM. Man.

then comes a drunk baby in the baby carriage

Kelly asked me to provide my thoughts on the LA Dodgers’ supposed interest in Pedro Martinez. I verbally shrugged.

“But, he’ll get to play with Manny!”

I couldn’t really work up the energy to care, so again with the verbal shrugging. I mean, I guess that’s nice for them. Though I’m not willing to truly believe that the two of them are really that close.

“But, it’s like when two ex-boyfriends that you still have positive feelings about realize they’re gay and get together! It’s awesome.”

Kelly’s take on this is interesting (for a variety of reasons we don’t need to get into here), but the thing is that while Pedro is definitely the ex-boyfriend I thought would be around forever, Manny’s more like a drunken child that showed up at my house and wouldn’t leave. I grew to love him and the spilled bottles of Jameson’s he left all over my apartment, but he was always a little confusing.

And so, those are my thoughts, I guess. I do hope Pedro gets to pitch again, but unless it’s in Boston, it’ll never quite make me happy enough.

let's get together before we get much older

[while discussing Pedro Martinez’s performance during the World Baseball Classic, and whether he will attract the attention of Major League teams]

“Because, I mean, more than I might want to get back together with [name of recent ex-boyfriend redacted], I want to get back together with Pedro Martinez.” — Katie [drunk, but I’m pretty sure she would have said the same thing sober.]

[Edited by Katie to note that I was actually not drunk in the least. I love Pedro more than I love most members of my family. Sorry, Dad.]