don't quit, don't even quit.

that’s my boyfriend

Josh Beckett went 5 innings, allowed 1 run, and struck out 9 today against the Pirates.

How many days ‘til opening day, again?

someone should create a josh beckett random fact generator

Josh Beckett has said so many wonderful things about this suspension. evidence:

“I’m not sure what I’m supposed to do. Am I supposed to give him a hug? I wasn’t really in a hugging mood right then.”

I assume Josh Beckett gets in a hugging mood after approximately 6 cans of Bud light, but that’s just a guess.

So, yes. A lot of awesome things. But, my favorite is definitely “I’ve never hit anybody in the head, and it’s not on my list of [stuff] to get done.” (Some sources say “stuff to get accomplished.” I’m pretty sure the former sounds a lot more like Beckett than the latter.)

And again, we’re just guessing here, but I think that list probably looks a bit like this.

Josh Beckett’s List of Shit to Get Done

-Subscribe Curt Schilling to AARP Magazine. [check]

-Follow DMB around the country.

-Bang co-eds. [check]

-Call Clay Buchholz at random times in the middle of the night, scream, “Are you ready? Are you ready to be a big game pitcher, you little chin-less baby?” and hang up.

-Buy ridiculous magic necklace. [check]

-Hunt world’s most dangerous animal, Mike Timlin.

-Win World Series. [check, check, and check]

-Somehow get no-press conference clause in next contract.

-Continue with years of preparation for actual plan to kill Bobby Abreu, which involves two orange vests, three rolls of duct tape, a reindeer antlers headband and a copy of the Boston Herald.

-Execute pitches.

Wouldn’t it be great if Josh Beckett & Ray Allen spent their suspensions hanging out? What would they talk about? Doubt Ray enjoys hunting.